@000___000: ♪ I'm like a bird, I'll only swim away, I don't know what a bird is ♪
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@UNTRESOR: 8 hrs sleep: So refreshed 6 hrs: Feeling fine 4 hrs: I will rip your head off for a minor transgression 2 hrs: Why is my boss a Minotaur
@Laser_Cat: "You're going out with that boy again? He's no good." "Relax, grandma." *furiously knits a condom* "Grandma, that's not how it works."
@Mr_Kapowski: My 8 y/o memorized my 12 character password that has upper and lowercase letters, numbers and symbols but can't remember to flush the toilet