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@canadasandra: I'm a puzzle wrapped in an enigma hidden inside a set of Russian Nesting Dolls, so deep, so profound that - what? Yes, I'll have fries.
@LackOfShame: [movie theater] Her: *Hands me popcorn bag* Can you put this down? Me: *grabs bag* You stupid, overpriced, salty piece of shit!
@clindsaysway: Whenever I'm in a difficult situation, I think, "What would I do?" so I can do the opposite thing