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@Ty_Schutz: Mailboxes were invented so you know how far away you can be in a robe before you look like a mental patient.
@Elizasoul80: Dear Californians- Quit telling everyone there's a drought. The ocean is right there. You're just lazy.
@JonasPolsky: I was about to commit suicide, but then a Nicki Minaj song came on the radio -- so I committed suicide twice.
@Molly_Kats: YOU TWEETED 23 TIMES TODAY. RT @realDonaldTrump People ask me what I do in my free time. The answer--I don't have any.