@_Ms_Moneypenny_: The FedEx guy said I look like a sexy pirate. I'm not sure if that's considered sexual harassment or flirting.
@JosesLovesYou: So Nicolas Cage and John Travolta walk into a bar and the bartender says "hey, why the wrong face?"
@NotJPo: "Baby, I'm gonna make you mine."
- sweet talker forcing someone to be a coal miner
@BertCarrillo: My dentist said I grind at night. I was like, ok stalker.
@WeissBrandon: Maybe Jesus went black, and that's why he isn't coming back.