@OuterJohn: 1) Throw a ball of yarn into a fencing battle 2) Wait until the fight is over 3) Retrieve your fully-knitted sweater
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@juliussharpe: For $100,000 I will come into your organization and evaluate whether the other consultants you're working with are idiots.
@1Happytwit: Shouting "Shotgun" will get you the front seat of a car or a heap of cash if you whisper it to a cashier.
@Barknado69: Me: why couldn't the lifeguard save the hippie Surgeon: wtf M: he was too far out man S: how are you still awake we heavily sedated you