@Jenny4ashley: 1,000 Ways To Die is so unrealistic. There's no episode where a man asks a woman 'what's wrong?'
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@TheTweetOfGod: Celebrity dumping an ice bucket on himself to raise money? Cute. Humanity dumping an ice cap on itself to raise sea levels? HILARIOUS.
@hello_saylor: My daily affirmation before work goes something like this: "I enjoy receiving a paycheck."
@Contwixt: Why go through the trouble of becoming an astronaut when you could just put a plastic bag over your head and roll down a hill in a freezer?