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@rablivingstone: People in the UK eat more bananas than monkeys. In 2014 they ate 73,432,384 bananas and only 6 monkeys.
@roadsidephil: Saw a "Toby Keith's I Love This Bar" that went out of business. Apparently he was the only one.
@caliluvgirl77: coworker: did you hear someone used all the charity money to buy snacks from the vending machine me: *laughing nervously* that's awful
@flashember: ME: this is Inky my pet octopus, Stompy my elephant and Mr Butters my horse FRIEND: the horse isn't Hoofy or something? ME: grow up Kalvin