YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@DarzieDAMN: That artsy picture you took of your Jack Daniels really spoke to me. It said "This persons an alcoholic but still takes decent pictures."
@jackmackenroth: My bank says my password isn't strong enough. Did it ever stop and think that my password has a lot going on right now?
@ShrinkMedia: My wife is amazing in bed. She can fall asleep immediately no matter how loud the TV is on.
@sarbeaaaar: MY DENTIST ASKED HIS ASSISTANT TO SUCTION (THE WATER OUT OF MY MOUTH)BUT I THOUGHT HE WAS TALKING TO ME SO I SUCKED HIS FINGER. IM MORTIFIED