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@warne888: When you're at someone's house? Normal people: "What a lovely house!" Me: "What's your wifi password?"
@OhNoSheTwitnt: Beauty & the Beast 2 is just 90 minutes of Belle and the prince shopping for new furniture after it all turned back into people.
@Phook75: I don’t need a calendar to tell me winter is approaching
*strokes wife’s leg hair*
@mansizedthumbs: In case nobody has Facebook, it's cold outside.
@jake_lach: In my dog's mind he's saving the world, one tree at a time.