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@MisterRots: If I ever become a ghost, no way I'm haunting some abandoned building. I'm finding the nearest lingerie store and setting up shop there
@chrissyteigen: "Whose funeral was this photo taken at?" John, serious tone: "I dunno. Let's see who's missing" possible funniest thing john has said
@StarWarsProblms: Emperor: How are my elite troops doing on Endor? Vader: They were all viciously murdered by teddy bears. Emperor: That sounds plausible.
@SonOfCha: Went into a massage parlor & asked for the happy ending, now I'm tucked into bed with a Korean woman reading me Cinderella.