@SouthernStylin1: 14 sent a text asking me to pick her up from school and added "not in your pajamas" so I'm wearing hers because good moms listen
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@PopSlapFunk: Arrhythmia, blocked arteries, leaky valves, "Hey, I found you on Twitter" and other things that will suddenly stop your heart.
@Carter_TCB: I bet if Jesus had turned water into Vodka. The Bible would've been a lot more interesting.
@WheelTod: My son is an embarrassment, I'm afraid. He came back from college for Xmas, and seems mortified to find that me & his mom have gone goth.