@Jeff_Sargeant: 2 out of 3 isn't bad. Unless you come home from the park with 2 out 3 kids. Then it's bad
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@dire_beard: Snow White: Someday my prince will come Prince Charming: I swear this has never happened before
@shariv67: My husband said he bought the toupée for me, but then got upset when I put it on. I dont get men.
@StarksWeek: Me: "you hang up" Her: "no you hang up" Me: "no you hang up" Her: "no y-" Jail clerk: "sir, you only get one phone call."