@Brianhopecomedy: My 3 year old is singing the rare 19 hour version of "Let It Go", using only 3 words.

@noxxhell: A homeless guy by the Gas station just proposed to me,it's a little short notice but I'm not getting any younger am I?

@TheTimmyToes: [JanSport keynote address] (audience grumbling) "where is he?" *CEO emerges from backpack on stage* *crowd goes nuts*

@TheAlexNevil: Darth: You should not have come back, old man. Obi Wan: I DIDN'T. I was going to Alderaan. You caught our ship with a tractor beam. Idiot.

@MommaWordsIt: Bonnie said I should join the Facebook like she did. Said its good way to get in touch with friends. Lord, at my age I'd need a ouija board