@themorris23: 20/__ -- Cyclops with perfect vision
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@TheToddWilliams: [2019 USA] "Where are you from?" -Trumpsylvania, how about you? "North Trumpkota"
@noogscorner: Batman: *puts on glasses* Hey do I still look like Bruce Wayne? Superman: Um obviously. Batman: Think about that for a second.
@Black__Elvis: I was in an Arby's bathroom taking a leak and the urinal cake fell to the floor but it was there for less than 5 seconds so I still ate it.
@edgeoftheword: And then alcohol said "Put that on facebook, it's hilarious." But alcohol was wrong. So very wrong.