@slimmy_shady: 23 Mind-Blowing Ways You'll Never Get Back the Time Spent Reading This List
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@KateQFunny: Running out of time to be a Trophy Wife, so now just hoping to be an I Finished The Race Tshirt Wife.
@WilliamAder: It takes a long time to delete 900 million dollars worth of stuff from an Amazon shopping cart.
@scorpicpanda: If I've learned one thing from watching horror movies, it's if you buy snacks from vending machines, you will die.