@1CleverGirl1: 3 days ago I ate my daughters's m&m's while she was napping. When she woke I told her the cat ate 'em She's still mad at the cat. Dumb kid.
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@phalguy: After watching Star Wars 20 told me he probably wouldn't go and see it again. And now I'm thinking he looks a lot like my old mailman.
@DannyZuker: My wife CLAIMS to be my best friend but she didn't seemed all that psyched when I bragged about this girl at work I just made out with.
@RickAaron: "I ran a half marathon" sounds so much better than "I quit halfway through a marathon".