@lisaxy424: 30 seconds staring confused at the calculator app before realizing why my phone wasn't calling the number I dialed.
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@TheMichaelRock: You know that confused look that old people get when looking at new technology? I'm like that, but with salad.
@TheWoodenslurpy: I bet dogs at parties get tired of being singled out by socially awkward humans.
@scarebro: Scientists use dead bodies? Jesus, I know they're nerds but they should still be able to make living friends.
@NotARatsAss: I'm one smooth operator until I have to get onto an escalator. Then it's more like a baby giraffe finding its legs.