@undeadmolly: 35% of all hospital deaths are caused by the attending physician failing to yell "Don't you die on me!" at the right moment.
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@AristotlesNZ: 3yo just yelled "face-five!" & slapped his brother in the face. I'm totally using that at work tomorrow.
@flashember: ME: I have so many questions SOOTHSAYER: forsooth ME: Exactly lol S: SOOTH ME: Yeah so- S: Sooth? ME: You only say sooth eh S: *nods* sooth
@robfee: The prequel to 16 & Pregnant could be called "15 & Fully Trusted By Her Parents to Make Good Decisions, We Love You Brittani."
@thatUPSdude: Turns out if you fake a heart attack every Monday work sends you to HR and not the hospital.