@BuckyIsotope: 4 out of 5 dentists recommend Trident sugarless gum. The 5th dentist is busy butchering protected wildlife.
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@ninjadinosaur1: My neighbour said I'm not allowed to feed the baby raccoons living in their shed. I wonder if they'd prefer left over chicken to sandwiches
@richardosman: My daughter is in China and sends me photos of mis-translations. This is my new favourite.
@JayCee302: I finally started writing the book on herbs I've been putting off for so long, I guess it's.. :looks directly at the camera: "About thyme"