@BuckyIsotope: 4 out of 5 dentists recommend Trident sugarless gum. The 5th dentist is busy butchering protected wildlife.
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@GoldenSpirals: Confuse the cable guy when he finally shows up at your house by telling him he'll have to wait outside until your favorite TV show is over.
@yab_kat: [gets pulled over] Officer: *through window* Do you know why i pulled you over? Me: *punches steering wheel* answer the man you criminal car