@SillyBlonde1: 45 minutes on the treadmill and I didn't die. I'll turn it on next time.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@dafloydsta: [job interview] Says here you're good with nicknames? "I don't wanna brag Super Cool Interviewer Man" *under his breath* holy shit he's good
@ThaJawn: Me: Off to adult school recess! Boss: it's called lunch.. Me: *runs by dribbling basketball with two hands
@davidschneider: I hope God rethinks his decision to allow an intern to run celebrity deaths in 2016.
@Kimgee8: Relationship status: the doorbell rings, my heart is pounding, it's the pizza delivery guy. Three-cheese, double toppings, thick crust.