@SillyBlonde1: 45 minutes on the treadmill and I didn't die. I'll turn it on next time.
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@GABBYdaAngSaya: [Bookstore] Me: *hands over Tangled coloring book* Cashier: How old is your daughter? Me: [sweating nervously] Of course it is
@Carter_TCB: One time I accidentally gave my cat acid. Thought he would really freak out but he just looked at me calmly and said meow for 10 hours.
@spicy_peen: How do people in the movies dig 6-foot deep graves with a shovel? I got tired digging a hole to plant a bush