@SaraESpivey: 5 out of 6 people enjoy playing Russian Roulette.
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@RoosterMustache: My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard and they're like "hey thanks" and I'm like "I'm just happy to be a part of this nice community"
@kelownagoose: If you have your underwear on over top of your pants, I'll let you in line in front of me at the pharmacy.
@ANastyGorilla: I'm thankful my wife harvested over $100,000 in potatoes on Farmville while I ate a grilled cheese for dinner & am sleeping on dirty laundry