@Shock_Monster: 54% of IKEA purchases end in divorce.
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@HeyZeus666: My dad use to take me to the circus to see the tattooed man and the bearded lady. Now, I can see them anytime shopping at Walmart.
@WilliamRodgers: Dr: Smoking weed causes memory loss Me: How? Dr: It just does Me: What just does? Dr: Smoking weed causes memory loss Me: How?
@gojarbe: *spills water on pants* ok don't let anyone think you peed your pants "hey what happ--" MY WATER BROKE, GET ME TO THE HOSPITAL