@DadInUtah: 6 year old: Daddy, what if the plane goes down? Me: Don't worry, your mom is with us. She never goes down. 6 year old: What? Me: Want candy?
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@TheRolo: A fun way to "Break up" is to tell them to "Go long" and then never throw them the football.
@daemonic3: Your honor, may I approach the bench? Judge: You may *benches 200lbs in 3 sets of 20 reps* The defense rests