@GrantTanaka: 7 is asleep, 8 is on his iPad, and 12 is all like "hey dad, why don't you remember our names"
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@Neuronicism: If she doesn't have a new hair style by the time you're done, you're doing it wrong.
@SilleVio: Joined a street protest. Suddenly a shot, panic and everybody started running. 3 hours and a gold medal later I realised it was a marathon
@MiddleageM: My husband fell asleep while watching Memento...was shocked to find "remember to NOT trust your wife" written on his forehead with a Sharpie