@EliBraden: 71-yr-old Jimmy Page is dating a 25-yr-old. The age difference may seem huge now, but it won't be as big a deal when she's 28 and he's dead.
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@ashmensch: *entire building at my work loses power* *I run all the way to Linda's office* Remember when you said light up shoes were a dumb idea?
@gtfml: When you do squats, are your knees supposed to sound like a goat chewing on an aluminum can stuffed with celery?
@yassinovic89: Gf: am I pretty or ugly? Bf: you're both hun :) Gf: what do you mean both? Bf: you're pretty ugly.
@chuuew: I'm not sure if this snake is trying to ask me a question or if he's just eaten a candy cane.