@stats_canada: 85% of Canadian moms need you to fix their computer this afternoon
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@Kim_pulsive: I had sex twice in 24hours and I'm so glad that I have 4000 people to brag about it to
@valenty__: Leo: *names his child Oscar* Doctor: "Would you like to hol-" Leo: "Say it like we rehearsed it." Doctor: *sighs* "And the Oscar goes to..."
@KyleMcDowell86: Juror:We find the defendant- *pizza guy bursts in* "Ive got 2 pizzas for Not Guilty" Defendant: Im Not Guilty Judge:NOT GUILTY *bangs gavel*