@stats_canada: 85% of Canadian moms need you to fix their computer this afternoon
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@Laser_Cat: A fun prank to pull on a neighbor is to introduce a species of invasive grass into his lawn.
@Duke1173: As I get older and continue to meet new people... I realize that swallowing should be more of a thing.
@baeblacksheep: I'm shaking my hands to get my nail polish to dry and now this deaf guy outside wants to know how the story ends.
@d_duhwit: Judge:"Since we can't prove who's baby it is we will ... cut the baby in half Worm Mom 1:"Sure Worm Mom 2 :"Ya do it.