@jergarl: 87% of my day is spent remembering my kids names and my anniversary and stuff and the other 57% is trying to do math.
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@realHamOnWry: I have to admit that while kids are a great gift I still prefer to play with the box they came in.
@randomlawless: I am NOT just 'a piece of meat' you know. I'm a ribeye steak... a bit fatty, but still quite tasty. Ok, I lied. I'm pork butt.
@eminmien: "Welcome, Mr. Bond." I say, spinning around on my chair. My elbow catches the glass on the table and spills water all over my death ray.
@NervousJr: Boss: "late again I see" Brain: think of a good excuse! Mouth: "your moms late." Brain: wow....