@SouthernStylin1: 9 called to ask how much bleach it takes to get purple ink out of carpet and because she's so cute and at her dad's I went with all of it!
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@LlamaInaTux: Moms 2007: I don't know why you text LOL when you aren't literally laughing Moms 2017: Cry face emoji, clapping hands, three monkeys
@Marlebean: *sees cute doctor in scrubs* *falls over* HELP! I need mouth-to-mouth! Doc: ... Me: Aren't you obligated to help? Husband: GET UP!