@PaigeKellerman: 90% of being a parent is shouting, "Remember to flush the toilet." The other 10% is flushing the toilet for everyone.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@huntigula: *Hamburglar returns home with bag of hamburgers* *his wife, holding a crying baby, slaps the bag out of his hands* "WE NEED MONEY, DAMMIT!"
@elonjames: "...and I would've won if it weren't for you meddling minorities, women, gays, young people..." - Mitt Romney #ScoobyDooVillain