@alfageeek: Fun fact: if you say “I did the math,” nobody argues with you because they don't want to have to redo the math themselves.

@JediGigi: M:$50 on the ginger with face tattoos H: Ma'am those aren't tattoos, they're freckles and you can't bet on a 6th grade spelling bee

@J_Mainwaring69: *Judge raises hammer* "I SENTENCE YOU TO LIFE" -*defendant chuckles* "I'm already alive you MORON!"

@1evilidiot: Don't be fooled by looks, butterflies taste just like moths.

@Parentpains: Date: "I don't like Taco Bell." *Pushes her in front of a bus.*