@RichHarris2: 95% of dentists recommend teeth.
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@daemonic3: *wakes up early on weekend *makes 12 pancakes *wakes kids up "Daddy, can we have waffles today???" *eats 12 pancakes
@Book_Krazy: Me: The new guy's a lumberjack? Boss: Yep Me: He seems nice... Boss: STOP Me: I'll bet he's good at... Boss: DONT Me: random axe of kindness
@KeetPotato: unstable person: "jet fuel doesn't melt steel beams, 9/11 was an inside job" stable person: "i look after horses"
@BrainFumbles: "Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, & nothing but the tru-" I choose dare, your honor "Bailiff, please hi-five the defendant"