@KalvinMacleod: 95% of parenting is using your sock as a mop.
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@CornOnTheGoblin: [gathers around casket and see's it's full of gatorade] uh oh, then that means [grandma's body is being dumped over the winning coach]
@MoistPork: "He's a jerk. I'm over him anyway. (5 minutes later) Ooh, he texted! I want to have his babies!" -Women
@robwhisman: don't hate robert altman's 1992 satirical comedy "the player" hate david fincher's 1997 psychological thriller "the game"