@omically: a 3-way standoff between a duck with a laser pointer, a cat with a vacuum cleaner, and a dog with a loaf of bread
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@EricGoldie: You're right, homeless man on the subway...it is a "clip your toenails into your McDonald's cup" kind of morning.
@retardedwriter: Never understood the desperation behind placing ur order in English at KFC/McD. Heard a guy practicing his order while sanding in the queue.
@zoeklar: my friend told me on first dates i should just "be myself" and "be confident" and i was like "ok but which one?"