@piyush938: A birth certificate is a basically a baby receipt.
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@Vodkantots: How to deal with anger and resentment toward someone: 1. Write down feelings and put message in a bottle 2. Break bottle over person's head
@SCbchbum: Every Scooby Doo episode would literally be 2 minutes long if the gang went to the mask store 1st & asked a few questions.
@XplodingUnicorn: [hardware store] Me: Let me do the talking. This is man stuff Wife: Fine Clerk: Can I help you? Me: I need a whacker thingy to hit nails