@FilthyRichmond: A box of Cadbury creme eggs just propositioned me. Now we're in a van together.
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@Playing_Dad: Welcome to passive aggressive club. We're so happy you came twenty minutes late. Sure, get a cup of coffee, we'll wait.
@Donna_McCoy: No thanks Black Friday crowds. I do all my Christmas shopping online in a blind panic, as God intended.
@SimplyEffortful: My husband: It'd be nice to have a wife who cooked dinner. Me: ooo!! Can we get one?