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@AimeeHelene1: A bug is just a bug until you put one on someone's face.
@kumailn: If Billy Joel wrote "We Didn't Start the Fire" today, it would be 2 hours.
@GSElevator: #1: Too many people still answer the phone like they don't know who's calling.
@Beer4AGoodTime: Getting married is easy, staying married is hard.
Just ask my girlfriend, her husband drives her crazy.
@bombsydoll: in high school I was voted 'who is that? does she even go to our school? Never saw her before'
@philyuck: my sixth birthday party was so formal that we roberted for apples