@__MICHAELJ0RDAN: A ceiling fan wont cut a bagel in half, not even on top speed
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@ojedge: "Spirits, are you there?" [ouija board] ＩＦ ＹＯＵ ＬＩＫＥ ＩＴ ＴＨＥＮ ＹＯＵ ＳＨＯＵＬＤＡ ＰＵＴ Ａ ＲＩＮＧ ＯＮ ＩＴ "Damn it, we've held a séaoncé again!"
@lazerdoov: Maybe Gotye was an actual goat that sold it's soul for the chance to be a human with a hit song and now he is back to just being a goat
@laurenmacdonald: I use the phrase "when I win the lottery" a lot for someone who never buys any lottery tickets.
@MiketheSourcer: Me: I love you. 5 yr: I love you too. Me: I love you more than you’ll ever love me. 5 yr: Okay