@garrettbarry70: A clown sighting was reported at the office this morning but it turns out Karen put her make up on in the car again.
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@heidi420x: Just yelled "out of my way monsters!" at a flock of seagulls, so I'm done interacting socially for the day
@TheAlexP: Rapunzel is my favorite story about a girl who would do anything to have her hair pulled.
@ChrisScarlette: [being robbed] Me: careful.. I'm ARMED *whips out bible Robber: lol *pulls gun out of bible R: oh *pulls smaller bible out of gun
@juliussharpe: I'm scared to go to sleep tonight knowing some maniac is running around out there slightly deflating footballs.