@mjkspeaks: a contractor is just a regular tractor that rips people off
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@truegritrumble: BOSS: I hate "yes men." ME: Yeah. Me too. BOSS: I like employees who speak their mind. ME: Yeah. They're the best. BOSS: You get me. ME: Yep
@mstluvstrinkets: Her: I'm running a little late. M: how many more seconds er I mean yeah sure take your time. Me, trying to play it cool with the babysitter
@BruceForce: Some dude told me he's had 100 times more girls than me which made me laugh so much because 100 x 0 is still 0.