@JKNenagh: a duck was about to cross the road when a chicken came running up and said... don't do it man ... you will never here the end of it!
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@orange_rhymer: Doc: have you been displaying any symptoms of vampirism? Me: I've been.. Doc: ... Me: ... Doc: ... Me: ... Doc: ... Me: Coffin. Doc: get out
@doktorj: *brings whipped cream to bed* Husband: Ohh, are we trying something new? Me: Will you hold this pumpkin pie while I get comfortable?
@mishakey: I never close my eyes in the shower because that's how murderers know when to show up and kill you.