@PencilWalrus: A flamingo in the streets and a lion in the sheets and a kangaroo at Target and I think Carl forgot to lock up the zoo last night.
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@juneohara65: "Go ahead, caller. . ." "Yes, hello. My dog dug up a femur and I'd like to make soup. Would you suggest carrots or potatoes?"
@PatSandora: NYCer: OMG you’re in the city?! Visitor: Yes! NYCer: I’d love to see you! Let me know if you end up on my exact block. I will not travel.
@Brampersandon_: THE WEEKND: I can't feel my face when I'm with you DENTIST (injecting novocaine): that's kinda the point dude