@shutupmikeginn: A fun prank is to search "buy antique dolls" on someone's computer because then all their Facebook targeted ads are creepy dolls forever
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@NotThatKristi: My jeans say "no more Christmas goodies" but my leggings are like "we got you, gurrrl"
@FrankConniff: A lethal injection that takes two hours has no place in a civilized society. And it shouldn't happen in Arizona either.
@daemonic3: [pharmacy] "I'd like a refill for this bottle of pills" PHARMACIST: Would you like childproof? "No thanks, I already believe in children"