@deardilettante: A fun thing to do would be to eat rat poison during a dinner party & then, when you die, they'll blame the host's cooking. Lol.
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@_davidlucas_: *Takes gift wrapping paper to the counter* Her: Did you want to buy that? Me: No, I just wanted to hold it for a while.
@awkwardphilippe: Age 10: One day I will get married and have 10 kids Age 20: I hope I find someone neat Age 30: *hissing sound*
@imence2: I love the smell of a camp fire. It reminds me of the night we kille.... .....I just love smell of campfires.
@samalmightysam: The Gym is like Church. Everybody thinks that by going one hour, one day, they'll erase what they did during the week.