@TheRolo: A fun way to "Break up" is to tell them to "Go long" and then never throw them the football.
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@RuthePhoenix: Had a really nice moment this morning with the postman as we held hands through the letterbox. Only slightly ruined by his screaming.
@Sarcasticsapien: I wanna learn to speak Italian. Partially to go to Italy but mostly so I can pretend I don't know English when people wanna make small talk.
@GoldenSpirals: [At Vision Center] Receptionist: Which Doctor would you like to see? Me: I'd like to be able to see all of them. That's why I'm here.
@atthecubicle: Just tested the structural integrity of a door frame with my face. It's pretty solid.