@SufficientCharm: A fun way to give your man a little scare is to ask him, "Do you know what tomorrow is?" and watch the panic set in.
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@AGreaterMonster: I always keep a hammer in my pocket in case someone asks me to help them fix something so I can immediately break my leg.
@Sirrruh: One day my kids will find a "We're Closed" sign for a grocery store & ask what it is & I'll sound like the old guy explaining shit in Zelda.