@fightforfood: A funny thing to do when someone's dog barks at you is say, "I don't speak dog," and then when they leave the room, speak dog fluently.
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@KalvinMacleod: Wile E Coyote: I can't get rid of this headache *TNT explodes* *anvil drops on his head* *bus flattens him* Dr: it's probably stress-related
@better_off_dad: God: I made a rainbow! Devil: I'm making all the fire alarm batteries die in the middle of the night.