@Kesse_GH: A Girl on Twitter, finally gave birth,Now she's been tweeting her baby pics every 20min & Makes me feel I am raising her child with my Data
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@eminmien: WAITRESS: Let me clear this up for you. ME: Thanks. WAITRESS: [to my date] He's not ready for anything serious right now.
@BadJordon: Wearing my bathing suit as underwear in case a random pool party breaks out sounds way better than too lazy to do laundry.