@DearAnyone: A good way to get out of a conversation is to take off one of your socks and hand it to the person talking.
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@Pappiness: Eric Trump said the Syria strike was swayed by a "heartbroken" Ivanka. He also pouted that dad has never bombed a country for him.
@Cheeseboy22: Sometimes when I'm sitting in a swivel chair, I'll turn around quickly and smile and pretend I'm in the opening credits of a sitcom
@rcromwell4: "Then, the handsome prince sees her dead body laying there and has to kiss her." "Ummm, what?" "Trust me, the kids will love it."
@NotARatsAss: Want to spice things up? Look them right in the eyes and lick their fingers seductively. My dentist didn't appreciate it, but yours might.