@NoLuckWanted: A guy just offered to buy me a drink. I declined, but heard him say lesbo to his pal. I replied "Only for you, baby". Now he feels special.
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@robdelaney: Walter White should get a monument & every healthcare exec should receive the sentence for his crimes. They made him.
@XplodingUnicorn: I tried to explain Pokémon to my 4-year-old. After hearing myself say it out loud, I'm pretty sure I ruined both of our childhoods.