@robfee: A guy on Catfish dated a girl for 4 years despite only seeing ONE picture of her. I wouldn't buy a futon on Craigslist with only one pic.
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@Beardson: Cat: Meow Me: Hi Cat: Meoww *picks up cat* Cat: Meowww *puts cat down* Cat: Meowwww *feeds cat* Cat: Meowwwww Me: WHAT DO YOU WANT?
@kelkulus: Apple has solved laptop theft by making them obsolete by the time thieves get out the door.
@iamspacegirl: SURPRISE! I scream, bursting from the vat of mashed potatoes. The other lunch ladies do not look surprised They do not look surprised at all
@chrissyteigen: I am so lazy I thought about looking at the super moon and decided 2033 isn't even that far away